Monday, March 13, 2023

Tourist Visit revisited



Last week, Tucker Carlson, he of the News network that is not news, attempted to rewrite history, the events of our nation's worst attempted coup. 

I don't make millions of dollars for speaking the opposite of what's on my mind like Tucker does. In fact, I get less-than-pennies on the dollar for telling the cold hard truth. Nor do I possess and extremely punchable face like Mr. Carlson -- though some would argue otherwise -- but I'd like to unrewrite his, and other's, account that infamous day.

Let's examine some of the theories the Right Wing has floated in order to sanitize their dirty bloody traitorous fingers.

"It was Antifa/BLM"

I'd like to know how so many Red Hats were able to recognize and distinguish members of Antifa or BLM (neither of which are organized groups like the Proud Boys, Oathkeepers, or 3% 'ers) in a crowd estimated to be well into the 5 digits. Are they all graduates of Quantico? Blessed with superhuman abilities to identify members of a political organization? Even when, as we just mentioned, there is no organization.

By the way, of the hundreds of people identified by videotape, the same videotape being paraded on Faux News in a lame attempt to whitewash the Insurrection, no members of Antifa or BLM were arrested and indicted by the FBI. None.

"Ray Epps"

Here's some more bullshittery spewing from the MAGA folks. You'd think after 5 years they'd run out of this mental manure but they seem to be able generate it on command. In the aforementioned videotape, one guy in the crowd, sporting the obligatory military style vest and red hat was identified as Ray Epps. And get this, he's an FBI agent. Or was. 

All but ignoring the fact that the FBI is one of the most conservative, stalwart Republican organizations in our once-great nation and counts among its membership,  rabid supporters of ex Precedent Shitgibbon.

The theory, and it's only a theory, is that Epps was nothing more than a government plant. Sent into the raging crowd in order to stir them up. It would physically impossible for one loony FBI agent to rile up a crowd of more than 10,000 into a mouth-foaming mob of podium-stealing, hallway-defecators.

Actually, I take that back, I've seen funny videos of a single zealous Australian Shepherd round up herds of unwitting, unthinking sheep.

"False Flag"

This is perhaps the most comical of the theories. And if I'm not mistaken it was even floated by TFG, who claimed he watched the news (though later he claimed he didn't watch the news) and that the people storming the Capitol and trying to undo the results of a free and fair election, were not his people. 

Perhaps Trump has never been to a Trump rally. Because if ever a crowd looked like Trumpsters, these were them.

But no, he and his flock, contended that they were actually Democrats, Liberals, and Socialists. Why, one must ask, would folks on the left side of the aisle, attempt to disrupt the federal certification of each state's electors, the penultimate step before inaugurating a new Democratic president in two short weeks?

They did it to make Trump and the GOP look bad, claim the reality-deniers.

Oh no friends, that happened months earlier when 81 million people elected Joe Biden, 306-202. Or how did one disgraced ex president put it, "... a landslide."

"Occam's Razor"

Here's my simple-minded explanation for the events of January 6th, 2021. 

A grifting, lying, morally bankrupt, narcissist who couldn't stand losing, began telling lies about a "stolen election." He used his bully pulpit to stir up his uninformed loyalists into believing they had been robbed. This was amplified by scurrilous, propaganda-spewing mouthpieces on Fox, OAN and Newsmax. And then, he and his cohorts of legal clowns, schemed to throw the certification process into a violent mess in order to trigger an archaic clause in the Constitution that would have thrown the election to the state legislatures, where the GOP held the slimmest majority.

In other words, he tried to steal an election. And for that he must be punished. 

With prejudice.
 

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