Life's Good

The world at large has still not beaten a path to my sagacious doorstep with regard to what's worth buying and what is not. But if I've learned anything in my 65 years on this Earth it's that persistence is the key. And that my initial attempt to plug in a USB device will ALWAYS be the wrong one.

Today, in my foray into senior online influencing, I take on my biggest and most expensive purchase yet. I'm hoping when the folks at LG read this glowing homage to innovation, value and thoughtful human design, they will move my name to the top of the list of brand loyalists due free and unfettered access to their full line of home appliances and electronics.

But first.

Replacing a 27 year old KitchenAid with a bum compressor is not at all as easy as one might assume. For one thing the model we had barely fit into the space we had designed, which due to some last minute compliance with Culver City coding necessitated a soffit (above the fridge) for HVAC purposes.

I dutifully measured twice and scribbled the dimensions on a paper towel (Bounty or Brawny, more on that at a later date.) The nearby Best Buy had just what I wanted. French doors, check. Bottom freezer, check. Ice/water dispenser on the outside, check and check.

It's actually what Deb wanted, but like a schmuck I never got around to getting it for her.

I evacuated every last food item from the old refrigerator, including a jar of capers from 1989, to the spare fridge in the garage. And lived like a Bohemian for a few days. Last Tuesday the new unit arrived. It was even more exciting than Trump's indictment. 

But it was short-lived.

The delivery guys came in and measured. It was 36 inches wide at the top. As I knew it would be. However, due to settling and wood warping, the gap at the bottom was only 35.75 inches. 

I was crestfallen. 

Only to be more crestfallen when the delivery guy pulled the old KitchenAid out and discovered I would need a T-valve to accommodate the 2023 plumbing standards. So, not only were my Bohemian days going to be extended, I would have to hire a plumber -- always a dicey proposition -- to get in there and install in a T-valve. Whatever the hell that is.

I would've done it myself, but my plumbing experience is rather limited. Mostly it's about jamming an auger down my sometimes-reluctant toilet. BTW, the $75 auger was the smartest purchase I've EVER made. 

If you know, you know. If you don't, you don't want to. Just don't think too long or hard on my mighty fiber intake.

The next day, the plumbers arrived. And just as I didn't have the money for the hydraulic rehauling, they didn't have the parts. Another day of shuffling off to the garage for an apple. OK, for the special whiskey ice and tonic water.

I'll spare you the details, suffice it to say, another day and half a mortgage payment later, the kitchen was ready to welcome the new LG LRFDS2503, in all its glory. 

The water dispenser worked. The ice maker worked. Even the wifi connection worked, so I can control the temperature and even diagnose the LG's flawless operation from my iPhone. I don't know why I'd want to re-jigger the temperature via my iPhone, I only know that I can.

And that makes me smile.

I also have well-labeled compartments for my fruits, veggies and deli items. As well as numerous, deep pocket shelves on both doors for mustard, Chulala and horseradish, both red and white for when I want to remind myself of the bitter labors of my swarthy semitic ancestors, who could not only build pyramids but could also gerry rig a T-valve.

I know it's just a stainless steel box that's keeps my beer and raspberries and creamed herring cold. And I know I shouldn't get too excited about it. 

But damn, look at that thing. Just look at it!