Thought of Train

Last week Uncle Joe gave an impassioned speech in Philadelphia in support of trains. 

I didn't actually catch the address. Nor do I feel compelled to. I know our new president won't spill any Code-Word intel, lash out at some reporter(s) or rage about TV ratings (seriously, who gives a dead rat's ass about TV ratings anymore). 

I also know what Uncle Joe did say would make sense, that it was discussed with his top advisors, none of whom gradumecated from Trump University. And that whatever he was proposing was for the good of the country and not for the sake of Ivanka's inheritance.

But to be completely honest, I have this nagging fear that in the middle of whatever Joe is talking about he'll freeze, have a senior moment and then in a completely rando-moment, ask if the microwave popcorn is ready yet.

Thankfully that didn't happen. Yet.

Turns out Uncle Joe was suggesting an idea that I have been railing about for years -- high speed trains. For optics sake, I wouldn't have staged the speech in front of a 1963 F7A 4528. That looks like it was refurbished from the train in the opening of Welcome Back Kotter.

Earworm Alert!

It is beyond my comprehension that this country does not boast a network of high speed bullet trains. You know like they have in places like China or India.

Apparently there is an Acela train, capable of 125 mph, linking NYC and Boston. But that's it. 

Years ago, my wife criss-crossed Europe on high speed trains, including a 5 hour skip from London to Glasgow, where I found myself in the bar car glugging drinks purchased for me by a group of over-served Scotsmen happy to meet a Scottish Yank. A Jewish one at that.

Given a choice of trains, planes and automobiles, I will take the train on every opportunity. Particularly those with a bar car. Sadly we just don't have as many trains as we should.

I suppose that's just the America we live in. We'd prefer to have trillions of dollars worth of tanks, planes and armored vehicles that will likely never get used, so we can bully the rest of the world and threaten to wipe out countries with our "super duper tippy top weapons."

We also enjoy pouring billions of dollars into a magical Wall intended to prevent brown people from entering our country, the same brown people who pick our fruits and vegetables, paint our houses, provide daycare for our kids, clean our homes and myriad of other shitty jobs that Americans see themselves as too good for. Or more accurately, are just too damn lazy to do for themselves.

When we could be using our resources to build trains, provide healthcare, make higher education more affordable, address poverty, repair our infrastructure and raise our standard of living like they do most first world countries.

But I guess that train has left the station.

Also, Fuck Trump.