When the Chosen, were not.

Editorial Note: If you are easily offended by humor regarding religion or have a thing against agnostics/atheists/heathens, you might want to skip past today's comical journey in heresy. 

Last week, while mining the internet for job leads -- I'm semi-retired but still have to put expensive Atlantic Caught Salmon on my table -- I was sent the following email from the good people at Glassdoor, home of the disgruntled ex-employee one star review.

Other than a quick smile, I thought nothing of it. I regarded it as a mistake. The same kind of AI mistake that resulted in my permanent banishment from LinkedIn. The algorithm giveth and the algorithm taketh away.

I screen grabbed it for posterity. And then shared it with my Team One Group Chat, a a funny talented bunch of writers (and Neal) that share cutting barbs and all manner of snarkiness throughout the day. 

Much laughter ensued. 

And then -- surprisingly it never occurred to me -- someone made a brilliant suggestion. It might have even been Neal, but probably not.

"Please, please, fill out the application. For God's sake, do it."

Who am I to deny the will of the lord, the mighty Host of Hosts? Besides, as a prankster who has engaged Nigerian Scammers and turned it into a book, applied countless times to join the Illuminati, and even submitted a letter and application for club membership at Mara Lago, this seemed like a natural course of action. 

And so I did.

First the complete job listing, in all its glorious detail.

And then  my application which included the rarely written Cover Letter. I usually eschew the damn cover letter because I have better things to do, like pushups or watch Tik Tok videos. But in this case, perhaps moved by divine inspiration, I went the extra mile. For science.

You might be thinking, "Oh that's funny and all (including the way Rich cleverly skirted the TOS police) , but Rich doesn't have the cojones to actually submit that." But you'd be thinking wrong. 

As I have often stated, I've reached that pleasing point in life when I just do not care what others say or think about me. Although it still stings that after a heated online political dispute 7 years ago, I received a DM from a dirtbag high school classmate that read something to the effect of, "You were an asshole in high school and your(sic) still one now."

Ouch!

I did submit the letter and all the requested details. And unlike many job applications which disappear into the internet ether, this one instigated an instant response.

But the Worship Director Bug has already bitten me. 

Maybe I'll take a walk down the street and see if there are any openings with the Lutherans.