Thursday, February 6, 2020

Half a book review

First a word about the title: He's not.

There are countless and disturbing examples of the enormous amount of vacant space located inside this man's cranium.

On their way to an Asian conference, Air Force One made a refueling stop in Hawaii. Eager to grab some good press, the Chief of Staff suggested that the President, First Lady and Secretary of State Rex Tillerson, take an hour to go visit the memorial at Pearl Harbor, the place that made December 7, 1941, a Day That Will Live in Infamy.

Captain Ouchie Foot agreed. However, while standing atop the remains of the USS Arizona, our pro-military gung-ho president turned to General John Kelly and said something to the effect of,

"Tell me again what happened here." 

Frederick Douglass died there, asshole.

That's one anecdote in a book chock full of them.

Here come the disclaimers. I'm only at page 221, in other words halfway through the book. I would be further along but the turning of each page raises my blood pressure. And the neck throbbing lasts an hour. So, in essence this is only Half a Book Review.

A 50% book review if you will.

Furthermore, it should be noted the authors work for the Washington Post. Some would argue that's a left leaning newspaper, so I'm willing to discount 10% of their account and chalk it up to Libtard bias.

On the other hand, they're both winners of the Pulitzer's Prize whereas Precedent Shitgibbon has only won a bowling trophy from his youth at the New York Military Academy. As well as the phantom Man of the Year Award from some fictional group in Michigan.

So I'm going to add back 5%.

Let's recap the math:

50% of book read

minus 10% for acknowledge media bias

plus 5% for exemplary author accreditation

That leaves me qualified to comment on 45% of the book.

But we're not done, because I'm also going to discard many stories because they are based on the recounting of employees who are no longer in the White House and might have a grudge to bear with Grandpa Ramblemouth.

So let's keep subtracting...

John Kelly -  5%
Rex Tillerson - 5%
Rence Preibus - 5%
Scaramucci - 10%
Steve Bannon - 5%
HR McMaster - 5%
General Flynn - 5%
Michael Cohen - 4%

In other words, if we take just 1% of this book at face value and put in context all the events that have happened since it was first published a few weeks ago, it is safe to say, without any hint of hyperbole,

"We are right and truly fucked."

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