Thursday, September 6, 2018

Time to roll this blunt

Letter #26 in our Thursday Thrashing Series.

This cartoonish face belongs to Senator Roy Blunt, who quite bluntly has no business holding elected office.



Senator Roy Blunt
260 Russell Senate Building
Washington, DC 20510

Dear Senator Blunt,

You Republican Senators make it so damn easy.

Allow me to explain.

Approximately 6 months ago I set out on a letter-writing mission to correspond with each and every Republican US Senator. With the exception of last week's posthumous letter to Senator McCain, in which I thanked him for upholding some standards of integrity, each missive has called attention to your collective and embarrassing dereliction of duties.

Upper house members, such as you, are responsible for acting as a check and balance on the Executive Branch. From what I can see, it's more like,

"Hey the balance in my savings account is low, I'll have Precedent Shitgibbon write me a check." 

And oh how you aptly named senators have risen to the occasion. There's been Senator Crapo. And of course Senator Chuck GrASSley, Senator Ben SASSe, and Senator John BarASSo. I scoured the Wikipedia page hoping to discover Senator Douchebag.

But before I could be disappointed, I ran across your name.

In that spirit Senator, I'd like to depart from my normal composition and just get right to the fecal-throwing bluntness, if I may.

* You, and your 50 rim-licking colleagues, will go down in history as the most complicit congressmen and congresswomen to ever hold office.

* You, and your ilk, will be marked as collaborators. What Vichy was to the shame of France, you will be to the shame of our once great nation.

* You, and your colleagues, exhibit an unprecedented contempt for the Rule of Law and have no business being in a building that actually makes the law.

* You, and your cohorts, have failed in every measure of moral leadership. Whether it comes to calling Nazis, "very fine people." Speaking up about hush payments to porn stars and Playboy bunnies. Remaining silent in the face of "shithole countries." Disgracing the honor of Senator McCain and his years of service and sacrifice. And turning the other way when, just a few days ago, the President of the United States chided the Department of Justice for daring to prosecute two Republican congressmen for corruption and fraud.

Allow me to be extra blunt, senator.

You suck at your job.

It kills me that my tax dollars put food on your table and provide healthcare for you and your worthless enabling family, including your three children, who not surprisingly grew up to be corporate lobbyists. Healthcare that should be going to people more deserving. And by that I mean any of the 8 billion other oxygen-breathing humans on the planet.

Perhaps I haven't been clear or even blunt enough.

You, Senator Sycophant, with your phony grin and your Neanderthal views on reproductive rights, same sex marriage, "religious liberty" and easy access to assault weapons, are a rotting sack of maggot-infested camel shit.

Put simply, if you want to Make America Great Again, resign.

Best regards,

Rich Siegel
Culver City, CA 90232

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