In the middle of the night.

There was a time when I would wake up 4-5 times a night to urinate, or if I may take this opportunity to say, pee. Thanks to my curbed consumption of coffee, I'm now down to 2-3 times a night. And like fellow wanderers of the night often have trouble falling back to sleep.

Last night I arose at 3 AM. It was my first night back in Culver City after fully recuperating from Covid while staying at my Palm Springs house. Laying there in bed, I could not help but to notice the total silence, an anomaly in Los Angeles. Especially for someone who lives a mile from the 405. And another mile from the Santa Monica Freeway, which hum along at 78 decibels through all hours of the night.

It should also be noted that I can hear a barking dog from 7.3 miles away. And will hunt down the offensive pup and write the owner a longwinded letter why they should bring the damn dog inside.

But it was silent last night. At one point I thought I had died and woken up in some kind of Twilight Zone. It was eerie. And instead of getting up to look out the window for signs of life, like my Meth-head neighbor lurking around in the backyard, I decided to lay still and soak it in.

This is where it gets weird. 

As I lay (lie) there a word popped into my head. It's not a word I use. Or even know. A word much more likely to appear in George Tannenbaum's blog than mine. Knowing I would forget the experience by the morning, I grabbed my phone and asked Siri to look it up and then did a screen grab.

I'll spare you the trouble because I'll assume you're not in the habit of tossing around fecundity in the next status meeting or dinner party...

That is not at all what I suspected. 

In fact it's about 180 degrees from what I thought. With its harsh stream of consonants, it sounds like a Teutonically-rooted insult, "You fecundatious SOB."

Can't say I'm not a bit disappointed. I'd love to drop that one on some uninformed Red hat (pardon the redundancy). 

With the mystery solved I was able to go right back to sleep.

You're probably thinking what Ms. Muse often tells me, "Siegel, you have a weird brain."

Thank you.