Top Fish

I didn't know when I started blogging this week, but it turns out each of this week's posts is about a holiday present I was given. As I'm notoriously hard to shop for, perhaps these thoughtful gifts deserve the air time.

And nothing is more thoughtful than my new FORM Smart Swim Goggles, given to me by Ms. Muse. It should be noted that I gave her plenty of thoughtful hints including, "Hey if you'd like to get me these cool goggles with the in-water heads up display, that'd be sweet."

We tend to be very direct and communicative with each other.

I have plenty of goggles. But the promise of real-time metrics, including distance, time, speed, stroke rate and even the very important head pitch, was just too irresistible. Especially on the heels of my increased viewership of video tips to improve my fitness and freestyle swimming. 

Turns out I'd been doing a lot wrong. Of course being able to jump in a pool and emerge 2 hours and 10 minutes later, having completed two miles means I've also been doing a lot right, but now the real work begins.

I've come to discover that swimming fast often means swimming slower. It requires concentration on  hand entry, hand position, a rhythmic kick and most importantly, the ability to g...l...i...d...e. Rhythm and gliding are not my strong suits.

Frustratingly, it also requires me to acquaint myself with the lingo of non-landlubbers. Swimmers, it turns out have their own shorthand. Which is good as all this data has to be squeezed onto a holigraphic screen no bigger than a thimble.

If you're not clear, as I was and still can be, here's a glimpse:

I love these new goggles. And my swimming habit is quickly becoming my new addiction. 

Will it replace my other obsession - the trolling and truth telling about Trump? Probably not.

Will I ever give up my European lycra suit for a much abbreviated new Speedo? Maybe. 

But unless you're a regular customer at the local Culver City Plunge or the Rose Bowl Aquatic Center or the Palm Springs Swim Center, you'll never see it.