Wednesday, May 11, 2022

Diamond & Silk & Brainrot

Last Friday, my friend Paul came over. Initially the plan was for him to bring Samosas (we both love Indian/Himalayan food) and drink whiskey by the fire pit. You might have noticed I have many friends over for whiskey and fire pit-side chats.

The plan changed when our Meal Train, arranged by our incredible friends, showed up --thank you Charlotte -- with the most incredible dish of chicken piccata, rice, green beans and a homemade Challah.

Afterwards, Paul and I sat outside and braved the 68 degree night air. We covered the usual range of topics: our kids, his kids (he's a 2nd grade teacher), married and unmarried life, and of course the decline of Western Civilization brought on by Captain Ouchie Foot. Let's face it any discussion surrounding ex Precedent Shitgibbon eventually leads to Diamond and Silk.

"Oh," I said, "I should write about them in the blog", and quickly sent myself a text as a reminder. 

"Wait, what are you gonna write about Diamond & Silk? How do you write a blog post about that?" replied Paul.

Good question. Until that is I stuck one foot down the Diamond & Silk rabbit hole. For instance, do you know which sister --that's right, they're sisters -- is Diamond and which one is Silk? I don't and I'll bet the PERSON WOMAN MAN CAMERA TV schmuck doesn't know either.

This may or may not surprise you, but those are not their real names. According to Wikipedia they are Ineitha Lynette Hardaway and Herneitha Rochelle Hardaway. I'm going to exhibit some cultural sensitivity here and just say that if I had two kids named Ineitha and Herneitha, I'd be looking for some easier nicknames to remember.

But here's an interesting fact. 

They were born to Freeman and Betty Hardaway, two evangelical pastors who were less interested in connecting people with the Lord and more interested in separating gullible clods from their money. According to the Wiki, they sold questionable weight loss cures as well as decorative wreathes that ward off witchcraft. What century is this?

In other words, Ineitha and Herneitha, I'm sorry Diamond & Silk, are no strangers to the scamming game. Perhaps that explains why they were among the first and most fervent to jump on The Shitgibbon Grifting Gravy Train way back in 2015, the Before Times.

They curated their clownish characters to perfection; landing paid gigs with the Floridian Fondler campaign, then with Fox Nation, then with Newsmax and eventually found themselves seated at the Big Table with the Big Fuckknuckle. (see picture above)

Just as it was shocking to learn that Kid Rock had been solicited for his views on North Korea by our former Commander and Chief (sic), I have no doubt whatsoever that they too were asked for policy advice -- because you know they were celebrities and had been on TV (and only smart people figure out how to get on TV).

"Well Mr. President if you ask me, I think you should break out those big bombs we got and nuke those Iranians before they nuke us," said Diamond. Or Silk.

"You go girl," nodding in agreement, said Diamond. Or Silk.  

God help us in 2024 before Diamond and/or Silk, is named to the be the new Secretary of Defense.

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