Russia, in the news

There's an armory up the street from where I live.
I should say there was an armory up the street from where I live.

Years ago, in all their wisdom, Culver City would bus in all the homeless people from Santa Monica and put them up at the armory. The one that's less than 1/4 mile from my front yard.

I have nothing against helping homeless people. They need our help and deserve our help. Problem was, the homeless people have legs. Most of them do. And they'd use those legs. They'd wrap themselves in a blanket and start roaming around the neighborhood.

More often than not they would congregate by the ratty liquor store on Culver Blvd. And once, while on my way to work, I spotted an older woman who had dropped whatever she was wearing down to her ankles and began "launching a meat torpedo off the SS Assitania." 

I probably won't include that in the flyer when I go to resell my home.

The armory is no more.
It has been converted into a museum. The Wende Museum. Two weeks ago my wife cajoled me into going over for a visit.

It should be stated that I'm not a big museum guy. Save for the time we went to the Guggenheim and the entire place was filled with the works of Cai Guo-Qiang. He, of Flying Dead Wolves fame.

I'll give it up to Mr. Qiang. This and the holy shit things he does with gunpowder, were amazing.

On the occasion of visiting the Wende, I was pleasantly surprised as well.

Because on display, there was double feature: North Korea Propaganda Poster Art & a robust collection of Soviet Era Kitschery, including toys, telephones, trinkets and the tools of Russian mid 60's spy craft.

That's Captain Petrakov commandeering his Hovertron 7000. "Get out of my way Yankee, colonialist pig dog, Captain Petrakov is here to save the day and redistribute wealth in an equal manner that will render class meaningless and bring great glory to the Soviet state."

Feast your eyes on the Communicom Model 9KFWQ-34, featuring state the art advanced electromagnetic thigamajigs. Crafted by former scientists of the Third Reich, this Stasi-inspired telephonic device will speed us forward to unimaginable prosperity. "Hello, Watowsky, can you hear me?" 

The Vojitech/Bering Bullet. This underwater reconnaissance satellite was built to change spycraft as we knew it. Planted into reefs far below the Aleutian Islands, the Bullet was intended to pick up radio signals from unsuspecting American military personnel stationed in Alaska.

"Oh come on sarge, whale blubber on toast again? Fuck this place."

Though it was built from durable titanium, the VB Bullet was also plagued by design flaws (see vents) that rendered this submersible un-waterproof and not very submersible.


The exhibit ends May 15, unless the country comes under the complete command of our Russian overlords, in which case, comrades, it will be on display forever.