Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Who Brain Farted?

Yesterday I went off about my failings and the business of advertising.
Today, I'd like to turn the tables.

I was paying the bills the other day. I like to let them stack up until the pile is so thick in doesn't fit in the little tray we've set aside for bills. I don't know about you, but when I pay the bills, I find the bill and toss all that other direct mail crap they stuff in the envelope. I suspect we could reduce global warming if ad agencies ceased this horrible practice. Sadly, there are entire industries set up to perpetuate this nonsense.

Right now, there are 7-10 high powered execs sitting in a conference room, carefully scrutinizing the September statement stuffer. They'll rewrite the copy. Argue about the strategy. Make the photographer re shoot the customer service rep answering the phone ("she needs more energy.") They'll rewrite the copy again. And some poor schmuck in Milwaukee will stay up to 4 AM to finalize the last color check and just barely make the deadline. Then it will end up on your kitchen table and you'll toss in the trash can without giving it a second glance.

A travesty right? It gets worse.

By chance, I gave the statement stuffer from the Gas Company a second glance and noticed a strange invitation at the bottom. As if the opportunity to follow Charlie Sheen and Pippa Middleton on Twitter weren't enough, now I can log on and follow my favorite utility company.

Which means another poor schmuck is actually generating tweets for the Gas Company.

Imagine if your lot in life were to write pithy Twitter updates that are in line with the brief, positioning the Gas Company as a "thoughtful leader with innovative ideas and a positive, energetic outlook towards the future while maintaining a vigorous commitment to environmental awareness." (BTW, this last quote was lifted from every brief I've ever seen.)

Furthermore, there's a crack team of millennial digital ninjas working feverishly to extend the brand and bring the Gas Company to life on Facebook. I can't wait to find out what the Gas Company is doing this weekend and what the gas Company had for breakfast. And I'm sure the Facebook page is chock full of clever nuggets like; Favorite book: Fahrenheit 451. Favorite Song: the Doors, Light My Fire. Favorite Basketball Team: The Miami Heat.

It's not all bad however. You have to give them credit for coming up with a snappy name for their little newsletter, Gas Matters.

My daughters will verify that statement, though not for the same reasons as the Gas Company.


laurenne said...

We should have that job! With our degrees in scatology, we should have no problem making gassy puns.
Although... I've been sitting here for five minutes and nothing's bubbling up. Perhaps it's better if someone else does that duty.

Also, nice comeback to the ACD.

Anonymous said...

Ass, grass or gas. No one tweets for free.