"Get off my lawn"

I haven't uttered that phrase. Yet. But judging from my ever-increasing crotchetiness and my blossoming prostate, I have no doubt those words will one day leave my mouth.

In the meanwhile, I've been hearing this one song on the radio quite a bit. It's called "Sinner".

It's a hip-hop/pop little ditty that gets way too much airplay on Los Angeles radio (which hasn't been good since the demise of KMET.) It's "sung" by wannabe thug who calls himself Big B.

In the very first stanza, he writes:

First of all,

I'd like to thank you for accepting this collect call

And tell you what you're about to hear is sincere

It's not the drugs or the alcohol

I know you said that it had to end

I don't expect you to bail me out again

But right now girl, you're my only friend

It's true, I did you wrong, for way too long

But that's the past so lets move on

It's a new song

So let it play on and on, from dusk to dawn

Till the neighbors complain or the cops come

[oh the life of a sinner]

In the California sun

I know in the realm of hip hop music there's a helluva lot worse than this. But I have a little news flash for you Mr. Big B.

If you're in your backyard and you're playing music in the wee hours of the night so loud that the neighbors have to complain or the cops have to show up, you're not a Sinner.

You're a Douchebag!