A Day at CostCo

When the media released a list of companies that had caved to the Musk/Trump Reich and pulled back on DEI, I made a mental note of where I should no longer spend my stay-of-a-dirty-home dollars.  

Of course it would be impossible to boycott them all. It's not like a commodotized shitty beer like Bud Light. Truth is I depend on huge airlines, Amazon and the Toilet Paper cartel for my daily living. But I had also read that there were a handful of companies that still valued humanity, and all the various historically marginalized people who make up that humanity. One of them was Costco.

So I decided to reward their bravery and I re-enlisted.

My late wife and I used to shop there until about 2005, when gaining entry into the Marina Del ray Costco parking lot was like a trip into the 9 Rings of Hell at LAX. 

But a liberal, commie Patriot has to do what a liberal, commie Patriot has to do. So I shelled out the $65 membership fee and have already begun recouping my investment with bulk savings on bulk items. Hello, 68 roll package of 2 ply TP.

As detailed on these very pages, I have been spending a lot of time in the Foothills. Following a first hand tour of the devastation in Altadena, where block after block was ravaged by the fires leaving a Dresden-like landscape, Ms. Muse suggested a little retail therapy at the not so nearby Costco in San Gabriel.

Sure why not, I can always stock up supplies for my Airbnb in Palm Springs, which none of you have inquired about. Despite the promise of ample sunshine, warmth and the very accommodating friends and family rate. By the way, I was just given another 5 star hosting review on airbnb.

Walking in to Costco was like walking into a different world. I don't mean that because we were the only caucasians speaking the Queen's tongue. I had forgotten the shopping carts were the size of Flatbed trucks. You could fit three Safeway shopping carts into one Costco, The Bulkinator 9000. Strap a 75 HP Briggs and Stratton engine onto one of these puppies and you can leave a VW Vanagon in the dust. Sorry Paul.

Not only will Costco sell you stuff at ridiculously affordable prices, they'll also feed you. Here, we stopped for some Burnt Brisket Ends. I could do an off-color ethnic joke about the meat, but since this post started as a celebration of DEI, I will refrain. 

In Aisle #5 we came across pallets and pallets of towels: Beach Towels, Bath Towels, Bath Sheets, Hand Towels, Face Towels, even Towel Towels (for drying off your wet towels.) 

"I should beef up my supply at towels at the airbnb," I said to Ms. Muse.

"Maybe replace some of the ones at your house too? They have a certain sandpapaer quality to them, " she hinted.

A jocular moment at the Costco.

Topped, moments later, as we were using our phone's GPS system to locate the cashier stands. On the way out, we passed by the Costco Pharmacy. You can get anything at Costco, well almost.

A young man in his late teens or early twenties ran up to the pharmacist. I didn't hear what he said. But I did hear what the man in the white lab coat replied...

"I'm sorry son, we don't sell Morning After Pills at CostCo."

The lanky young man left the counter and sprinted towards the exit. 

Perhaps even faster than when he ran in.