Man with the Plan

It's all too easy to find fault with greedy Wall Streeters, unregulated banks, and unscrupulous insurance companies. But at the heart of our current economic crisis, there is the short-sighted, status-loving American consumer living well beyond their means.

Take this savings-challenged Mercedes driver for instance.

I'm the polar opposite of this Colorado cretin.

I'm all about funding the 401K plan. I don't need a shiny, new black car. Or a 15 megapixel digital camera. Or private golf lessons (OK, I could use private golf lessons.) But the point is I don't live beyond my means. I'll wear a snuggie to save on heating bills. I'll eat off-brand ketchup. I'll take the complimentary shampoo and conditioning bottles they put in hotel rooms.

You see I'm saving for a rainy day. And planning for the future. Because I've seen too many movies. And don't want to end up in some dirty assisted-living retirement home where I have to rely on a cranky, snaggle-toothed nurse with foul cigarette breath to change my diaper.

I want to be in my clean, comfortable house. And have that done by my wife.