What do we have here?

I like to think of myself as an observant person. 

And when I say observant I'm not referring to being an observant Jew. Or anything like that. What few rituals I did know and practice have gone by the wayside. This year for instance, was the first in 5 or 6 decades that I did not abstain from eating on Yom Kippur. If called to defend myself for such a transgression, I would simply reply that, "Hey, I do intermittent fasting throughout the year. And I was hungry."

When I say observant, I mean I have a keen environmental awareness. OK, I like think it's keen.

Yesterday for instance I was walking the 3 tenths of a mile from my house to the Culver City Plunge Pool. Swimming, it turns out is the perfect exercise for my creaky knees and my looming sciatica. As I was passing the little strip mall on the corner of Overland and Braddock, I noticed a man exiting the local "massage" parlor. 

And when I say "massage" I mean that in the very catholic, with a small C, sense of the word. 

It's a Happy Ending joint and everyone in Culver City knows it. Since I rarely see anybody exiting the "Massage" parlor I decided to futz with my phone and watch the clearly-relaxed man skulk away. Which is exactly what he did. He walked quickly, with his head down and crossed Overland to the other side of the street, where he got back in his vehicle -- a large yellow school bus.

I suppose a happy contented school bus driver is better than the opposite.

Speaking of unhappy and discontented, there are the two losers who live in the house behind me. They're both in their mid 60's and until recently both were living with their mother. One is a lush and the other is a loudmouth, perhaps the loudest angriest man on Earth. Every other word out of his mouth is an F bomb.

As I was enjoying one of my late night jacuzzi retreats, I heard the two brothers fighting. Not that unusual. But the volume was unusually loud until it wasn't. The angry brother, upset with his sibling's over-imbibing, called the police. I was treated to the whole story, which was pretty inconsequential until...

"Hello Sergeant, I'd like to make a Citizen's Arrest on my brother." 

That made my night and I had to turn the jets up high to cover my laughter.