Tuesday, September 10, 2024

You gotta know when to fold 'em


The topic of top sheets and how I've eschewed them often comes up between Ms. Muse and I. It is a source of great curiosity. For both of us. Akin to walking through the woods, finding a cool flat rock, turning it over and discovering something you've never, ever seen before...

"What? I can't believe what I'm seeing. That's impossible."

It is a running gag that never fails to produce a giggle followed by the shaking of the head, followed by, "You're a weird one Siegel."

In fact, I was all set to write a non-consequential post about top sheets (she likes them, I don't) only to discover that I had already covered that California King Size area of almost-blogworthy real estate.

But that does not mean we have the entire linen closet sufficiently explored. 

Because, as the picture above would indicate, Ms. Muse and I have equally discordant, though not contentious, views with regards to towels. Which, if I'm doing the math correctly, have even more components than their bed-related cousins: the flat sheet, the fitted sheet, the shims, shams, pillowcase, and dust ruffles. 

Towels if they ever appeared as a category on Jeopardy would leave me just as dumbfounded as British Royalty, Roman Gods, and not surprisingly, Table Settings.

If you were to ask me for a towel, I would likely ask you, "Big one or small one?"

That's about as much towel stratification I've got space for in my oversized head. Turns out there's a whole lot more to this towel business than I ever expected. Just ask the folks who manned the counters at the now defunct Bed Bath and Beyond.

What Darwin did for the classification of animals and plants, Martha Stewart, or her predecessors have done for towel taxonomy.

It is only since last Thursday that I have come to learn there's is a difference between a hand towel and a dish towel. I don't know what that difference is, suffice to say I might have dried my face with the same towel that I used to wipe up the errant bacon grease that spattered on my counter.

This stuff is important, I'm told, if I'm going to be successful in the hospitality business and the renting out of my Palm Springs vacation home, now sporting a brand new refrigerator as well as new washer and dryer. 

See more here: https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/1024804526943007430?source_impression_id=p3_1725644530_P3WkBhjPPu2gPzmr

The new larger and more efficient washer and dryer are being put to good use to keep the linen closet stocked with all the aforementioned linenage.

By the way, who says you can't teach an old dog new towels. I now know the difference between a bath towel and a beach towel, the latter have stripes.


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