Thursday, February 27, 2014

Mercury, Schmercury

Last week I read an article that stated half of all Americans believe Astrology is "very scientific" or "sort of scientific."

The "sort of" qualifier says so much about our current state of education.

I'm willing to bet that in Kansas, where the laws of physics "sort of" apply, the numbers run even higher.

This week, you'll be happy to know, Mercury will be coming out of retrograde. Meaning of course that traffic jams will disappear, politicians will speak honestly and the Obamacare website will be glitch-free.

To be honest, I didn't know much about the whole Mercury in Retrograde phenomena until I did a little digging online. Prior to that, it was only familiar to me through dimwitted Facebook status updates.

I'm not saying this to polish any apples, but with a few notable and unnamed exceptions, I run around with a pretty sophisticated and intelligent group on social media. People whose intellect I admire and whose opinions I respect.

You know that is until they disagree with me.

You can imagine how shocked I was to hear what's-his-face bitching about his mislabeled Cafe Americano at Starbucks or so-and-so blaming a bounced a check on the position of a tiny planet 48 million miles away from Earth.

This comes from colleagues, some of whom are in positions of power. Significantly more power than me. The power to steward brands and effect the paychecks of hundreds of employees who work under their "command."

Suffice to say the fruit from their tree has been poisoned. Once you've played the Mercury-in Retrograde Card, there's no going back, you are an astronomically-challenged, intellectually-starved cretinous tool.

So the next time one of these star bloviators has something to say about my work being off strategy or the rough cut of a spot doesn't make sense, I will only have one appropriate non-verbal response.


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