Monday, January 25, 2021

120/80


Can you feel that?

I know you can. That is the nation exhaling and our collective blood pressure dropping away from the Coronary Death Zone. This grateful relief came at 11:49AM on January 20, 2021. Truth is, it should have occurred 3 months earlier on November 7th, when the race for president was officially called for Joseph Biden.

Instead, our America First president put America last and made us sweat out 60 plus court cases, many of those adjudicated by shady Trump appointees. 

Multiple state recounts, all no doubt, paid for by US taxpayers.

Libelous accusations lobbed against Dominion, the maker of many voting machines, who is now countersuing the braindead trumpsters who repeated their Biblical lies on National TV.

And countless flatulent appearances by Rudy Giuliani, who treated the country to a comical shit show of everything a lawyer should NOT do. I still double over in laughter when I hear mention of the Four Seasons Total landscaping.

All topped by a Torch and Pitchfork Brigade of Red Hat wearing White Trash who thought their leader commanded them to storm the US capitol in a lame attempt to topple the government of the world's foremost superpower. 

Shockingly, if not for the bravery of some, they came within a bison horn's length of seizing our legislative branch and hanging Mike Pence. Then, one must assume, they would have retreated to Golden Corral for wings and the All You Can Eat Bacon, Mac and Cheese Buffet Bar.

The mind boggles. 

But as our new, and infinitely more qualified President said, "Democracy prevailed." And the millions of men and women who valiantly gave their lives in the service of this country for the past 240 years, can resume their well-earned peaceful sleep. 

How dare these fishbrained fascist fuckers do what they did? 

Moreover, they did it all in service of a NY film flamming, grifting conman who'd never let one of these rabble rousers within a mile of his shabby shitbarn country clubs.

Of course while half the country starts sleeping regularly and cutting back on the nightly pain-go-bye-bye sauce and resumes a life of relative normalcy, 74 million of our compatriots will whine and cry and rail to the heavens about a stolen presidency and an election that was not free and fair.

And therein lies the ultimate irony.

They have no evidence of cheating. None. But they feel there was widespread fraud and election tampering. All while choosing to ignore actual, verifiable, smoking gun evidence of foul play.

At the risk of raising my blood pressure again, I have three words for these die hard Trump dingleberries who can't accept reality...

"Fuck your feelings."


 

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