Celebrity Week Part 3

As I mentioned yesterday, the best projects are the ones touched by the least amount of people.

There shouldn't be too many cooks in the kitchen.
In fact there shouldn't be any.
Great food is prepared by a chef.

A skilled man or woman who knows the ingredients because he or she has picked them.
Knows the preparation, because he or she has done them.
And knows the results, because no one else was around to fuck things up.

I seem to have digressed.
Maybe I should have had someone help me write this post.

Years ago, a woman who used to work for me but who was now my boss, brought me in for a fun assignment. She and her partner had produced a campaign for Pedigree dog food that was simple, efficient and charming.

It was just a dog on a yellow syc, looking directly at the camera.

The viewer would hear the inner thoughts of the dog voiced by X-Files star David Duchovny. They had so much excess footage of dogs the Creative Directors thought why not churn out a dozen more extra spots?

The best news was these would be bonus spots. The client didn't ask for them, but the agency, showing some initiative, chose to over-deliver. Always a good strategy.

Moreover the scripts were just 15 seconds long. Just enough time to deliver the joke, the sell and the logo.

Duchovny came into the recording studio as if he just rolled out of bed. Disheveled, unshaven and yet completely professional. He nailed the sarcastic tone in one or two takes. Which was a blessing.

Because if it's one thing TV and film actors hate, it's taking direction from the no-talent sleaze bags who work in advertising -- that's me, and mostly likely you, thank you very much.

I wish there were more interesting things to say about David Duchovny, but there aren't. He was all business.

We did a dozen of these snarky snippy spots. Not one of them made it to air.

That's the odd thing. I like to think I can write funny. Some of you who read this blog think I can write funny. But clients, many it seems, are just not in the same boat.

Fuck 'em, it's their loss.

(please excuse the low resolution, I'm trying to recalibrate the flip-flaks)