Great Again?

They say they want to make America Great Again. I'm hardly the first to ask this, but when was it great?

Most Red Hats won't answer the question. I will. Not because I know, but simply because it bolsters my theory. Of which I am about to lay out. 

I know that yesterday I claimed I was not a very good persuader but I'm also not a very good quitter. So I'm going to throw on my Math Teacher tweed sport coat and take on the persona I would have inhabited had I not slipped into the glorious and glamorous world of advertising, home of the ubiquitous SKIP AD button.

I'm going to suggest that when MAGA speak of a different time when America was great, they are referring to 1954. 

In this post World War era, America was prospering. But that's not what really tickles this white dream...er, wet dream. Seventy years ago, gay meant being happy, black lives didn't matter, women were in the kitchen and Jews were not allowed on many of the country's finest golf courses. 

(Pssssst, while you guys were hitting little white balls into a cup, we were forming cabals and taking over the world's banking, media and mustard making institutions.)

But let's be honest, Americans don't choose their presidents based on social or moral progress. That's far too nuanced. And we're not the most politically astute people. Our idea of patriotism is shouting USA, USA, USA in the streets and adorning our bridges with 500 foot flags. Truth is, most Americans can't tell you the difference between a communist and a fascist. Or a socialist and a socialite.

In fact that woman from Georgia, uses the terms interchangeably. Often in conjunction with the Gazpacho Police. 

What will decide the next election, and many thereafter, are Kitchen Table Issues.

There can be no doubt that in the post-Covid era, we faced inflation. I know this will come as a shock to Red Hats, but so did the rest of the world. Not that it matters. USA, USA, USA!!!

Let's clear the kitchen table and break out the Texas Instrument calculator. 

Mind you, the following numbers are anecdotal and may or may not resemble actual facts. But when one presidential candidate lies about every number he has ever quoted and then goes on to talking about batteries, sharks and choosing electrocution, does it really matter? 

In 1954, a housewife (sorry ladies) might have purchased a dozen eggs for $1.29 in 1954. Adjusted for time and cost of living, let's say that would be the equivalent of $4.29 in 2020. Then came Biden's God Awful Crushing Commie/Fascist Inflationary Times in 2023 and the price went up to $5.29 !!!!!!

That's an extra dollar for a dozen eggs!!! And he had the gall to eat ice cream on the television.

If that housewife were to buy a dozen eggs twice a month, that's two extra dollars. Over the course of a year, she would have shelled out $24 dollars just for the privilege of keeping her family fed with Western omeletes.

Which came first, the increase in the price of eggs or the chickenshit bump in gas prices? 

If we were to extrapolate a bit (and we will) the average household, at the height of Sleepy Joe's  Soul Crushing Inflation, might have been spending an additional $547.93 a year to buy eggs, gas and Slim Jims, etc. just to be an American and live in the greatest country on earth™.

That's mind blowing. 

MAGA people will tell you "Freedom isn't Free." But apparently $547.93 is a cost they're just not willing to bear. Nor are they willing to concede that during that time, wages have increased an average 4.92%, their 401K plans increased 13.7% and that the economy of the US outpaced the economies of the developed world.

None of that matters. 

Because come November, they're sticking with the shark-fearing, twice-impeached convicted felon who loves the uneducated, calls our soldiers Suckers and Losers, doesn't take responsibility for the death of more than a million Americans, retribution-promising, ignorant wannabe dictator who just last week said, "haul out the guillotines." 

USA, USA, USA!!!