This is my new favorite Peloton Instructor, Charlotte Wiedenbachenstrum. As you can see, she is quite attractive. Perfectly fit. And tastefully adorned with interesting tattoos that draw attention to her amazingly contoured athletic body.
Lest you think she is my favorite because of her looks, you'd be mistaken. There's plenty of eye candy on the roster of Peloton Instructors. Each one impossibly more attractive than the next. Including Kendall Toole, Olivia Amato and Emma Lovewell...that's right her name is Lovewell.
But truth be told, they get on my last old man nerve with the constant yacking and the cliche motivational blah blah blah.
If I do a class with an instructor it's mostly with Sam Yo, a former Buddhist monk who brings a positive attitude and a lot less talking to the workout.
So what makes Charlotte different? She conducts her classes from the Peloton Studio in Berlin. She's full blown German. Graced with blond hair, blue eyes and a high capacity for resistance training, dare I say, a Master Racer.
Doh!
It goes without saying that Germans and Jews have a troubled and complicated relationship. My father, a Bronx born street guy was in his testosterone-fueled late teenage years when the footage from Auschwitz, Dachau, Bergen Belson, Treblinka, the list is long, was released. And though hardly religious, but descended from religious old folks in the old country, he was hopping mad.
Hence we never had anything from Germany in the house. Nor would he even look at a German car. He'd even buy off-brand aspirin because he didn't want a dime of his money supporting the folks at Bayer, who freely used Jews as slave labor.
And on a personal note, Germany is where I had my first Panic Attack. A phenomena I had never even heard of, but exacerbated by jet lag, Red Bull (to stay awake in business meetings) and this nagging feeling best demonstrated by Woody Allen...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z8TSvMx2wPI
But so much has changed.
Recently, I saw a video of Israeli Air Force fighter jets do a fly-by over a concentration camps. And kudos to Germany for facing their past and taking the steps to make amends. Americans, particularly the clods against DEI and CRT, could learn a few things.
Also, I have a Braun electric shaver & coffee maker (two separate machines). I own an Audi, a very fast Audi. Years ago, Deb bought me a Racing adventure at the nearby Porsche Experience Center, not recommended for those with a weak stomach. And my medicine cabinet has entire shelf of Bayer Aspirin, the Heinz Ketchup of Aspirin.
Oh and I have Heinz Ketchup.
And now I have Charlotte Wiedenfraumann, who conducts her classes in the language of love, German. And does it loudly. With great vigor. I have no idea what she's saying, which makes it bearable. I don't want to get into TMI-land, but as I was explaining all this to a friend, there's something titillating and verboten, about being "commanded" to pedal faster and harder by Ms. Weidengoerhingberg.
It might be akin to why Mel Brooks was compelled to write The Producers and the hit single "Springtime for Hitler."
That's what we Jews do, we take the pain and persecution of our descendants and re-sculpt it into something funny. Not a bad survival skill for a tribe that has lasted more than 5000 years.
I wonder if Charlotte would consider doing a class in Thigh High Black Jackboots?
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