The Tale of Becky Richards

 

You know me, I love a good scam. Not the scam itself, people who phish the internet looking for marks are scum. No, I love to scam the scammer.

Recently, I've been spending more time on Twitter, fighting the good fight and combating the GOP forces of disinformation. Oh and trolling shitheels like Boebert, Greene and Joel Osteen, he, of the cash hidden behind the bathroom drywall fame. 

A few weeks ago, I received a DM on Twitter from Becky Richard. She was looking for a friend. And I thought it must be difficult for an incredibly attractive, accomplished swimmer in her late 20's to make friends, so I took Becky up on her offer.

And with that we had begun to dance.

Becky wasted no time throwing chum in the water.

It should be noted that I never go by the name Dick. And only used it in my twitter handle(@glasgowdick), along with Glasgow (my mother's birthplace) as a lark and never thought I'd be on the platform past 2007. 

But it served its purposes here very well.

Oh Becky, you not-so-little minx.

I knew that the request for $$$ was coming soon, but Becky was going to have to do some legwork before she saw a dime.

Naturally I obliged her curiosity.

Years ago, some vision-impaired friend said I bore a slight resemblance to Marlon Brando. It might have been the nicest compliment I ever received regarding my appearance. So I stored that in the mental vault. It too served its purpose here.

A week later Becky tipped her hand. With the rather juvenile Ask. I knew this was coming. I also knew that Becky was not Becky. I did a Reverse Image Search -- a great Google tool -- and discovered he/she/it was using a picture of a British Porn Star, Scarlett Jones, to lure unwitting victims. 

Further research reveals Scarlett has no problem making friends.

Now is when the fun begins...

Can you just feel the sexual tension?

I decided to string this out and make "Becky" who I picture as a 14 year old boy who is too clever for his own good, salivating over the thought of a free $100 Google Play Card so he can get Call of Duty 23 or Halo or whatever it is kids are playing these days.

Then, playing the role of a tech-delinquent, stupid old man -- not particularly difficult for me -- I asked for further instructions about getting the photo to her in Dallas, where she claimed to live.

And by now you can sense the desperation. 

Becky is giving me "her" actual phone number, which I'd be tempted to call, but I know better, so I gave her just what she wanted, a picture of the $100 Google play card.

Then, discovering I had wasted an inordinate amount of time with this ruse and failed to renew the registration on my wife's car, I decided, OK my eye-rolling wife decided, I had better things to do with my  time and played my trump card.

Bye Becky, better luck next time.