I owe, I owe...

Opened my Wells Fargo statement today and discovered the IRS had just cashed the check for the remaining balance of my 2019 taxes. 

That's right, I said 2019.

Turns out that because I had withdrawn a significant amount of cash from my IRA to finance the remodeling and reaping of my uncle's house in Palm Springs --- a thousand bucks for a shower head? --- I had an unusually large tax debt. 

In fact when my CPA told me about this, back in March 2020, just as we were going into Covid lockdown and weeks after we found out about my wife's illness, I thought, "I wonder if arsenic has a bad aftertaste."

I consulted my brother who is also a CPA, though not my CPA, who suggested I pay off as much as I can and suffer the IRS penalties. Which turned out to be a great idea considering the alternative of withdrawing more money from my IRA and incurring a 33% surcharge in the form of future tax obligation.

Wouldn't you know it, my CPA just emailed me the great news about my 2020 tax returns. With an equally large and equally unpayable debt that I now owe Uncle Sam.

As you might expect, I am thoroughly chuffed. Chuffed, if you don't know is English slang, meaning excitedly happy. But I contend the Brits have it all wrong. Chuffed is a word that sounds like pissed off, peeved, outraged, etc. 

But I digress. 

Yeah I'm not happy about going 5 digits deep into new debt. Especially when I know fuckers like Bezos, Branson, Musk and Shitgibbon himself, have jigged the system in their favor and pay next to nothing in taxes.

Nevertheless, I have a grown-up's understanding of how things work and will happily, ok maybe happily is the wrong word, pay up. 

Why? 

Because I enjoy living in a country with paved roads and semi-stable bridges. 

I take comfort that we have the world's most sophisticated defense systems, working 24/7/366 to fend off enemy attacks, except the internal ones.

I know that our standard of living, including access to Dave's Hot Chicken, on demand Netflix and mammoth taxpayer-funded sports coliseums in every major city, is not FREE.

You gotta pay for this shit. We all gotta pay for this shit. 

Just not all at once, so sayeth my brother.