Real Men of Douchebaggery

They say the art of radio commercial writing is dying a slow painful death. And though rarely correct on such matters, today the people that make up the collective "they" may be right.

Last week I heard a commercial for Bud Light. It was the latest in the long-running "Real Men of Genius" campaign, only this time there was very little genius. Past unsung heroes included Mr. Way Too Much Cologne Wearer, Mr. T-Shirt Launcher Inventor and Mr. Stinky Breath Breather Outer.

These made for inspired and hilarious radio spots.

Then Mr. Client Thumbprint Maker must have stepped in. Because the most recent Real Men of Genius homage was to Mr. Blue Aluminum Beer Bottler Inventor. Wow! They've gone from poking fun at NYC cab drivers whose back seats look like a Turkish bazaar to self-serving unfunny references to their own beer bottles.

Not only has the campaign jumped the shark, that shark has been cut up into sushi and left in the window display for the maggots and the houseflies.

Here's a thought and I'm just spit balling here because I'm not on the clock and I don't like to give this stuff away for free. But if the writers on the Bud Light account have truly run out of genii to pay homage to, I suggest they turn 180 degrees and start ripping on the Real Men of Douchebaggery. Those people who have gone to extraordinary lengths to make our lives a steaming pile of wet, warm uncollected doggie poo. You know, the ones that drive us to drink in the first place.

I'll start you out (and not because I just spent an hour disputing a charge on my Bloomingdale's credit card.)

ANNCR: Bud Light presents, Real Men of Douchebaggery....

SINGERS: Real Men of Douchebagggery.

ANNCR: Today we salute you Mr. Computerized Phone Tree Inventor, you took the customer out of customer service. Not happy with your handiwork you didn't stop there, and thoughtfully threw out the service as well.

SINGERS: Please remain on the line, your business is important to us...