Monday, October 15, 2018

The problem with small ball


I've been watching a lot of baseball lately. Unfortunately that also means listening to Joe Buck and the laconic Ron Darling. Sorry guys, you're no Phil Rizzuto or Ralph Kiner.

I don't watch during the regular season because the 162 game renders most games meaningless. And let's be honest, baseball, slow as it already is, can induce sleep faster than two tablets of Ambien, washed down with two fingers of whiskey.

The post season is different. The stakes are higher. The home field advantage is more important. And the strategies play a role on every pitch.

This year the home run ball is king. I don't know what the front office did but according to Fox Sports Stat people, balls that go yard have determined the outcome of more than 59% of all games.

And guess what?
Viewership is up.

People like the long ball.

I like the long ball.

Sure a cagey manager can produce a run here and there with a bunt, a fielder's choice and a sacrifice fly to right field, but if I wanted to watch small ball I'd go up to Botts Field in Culver City and watch the pre-pubescent boys scatter around the brown grassy lot.

I'd much rather see Joc Pederson, Ian Kinsler or Ryan Braun (all members of the Tribe, btw) swing the bat like some Inglorious Basterd and put the ball out of the house and into the C-5 parking lot.

If only Chief Marketing Officers learned what baseball brass, and football brass, who have also found inventive way to increase the scoring in each game, give the people what the people want.

We don't want shitty little ads jammed into our online videos.
We don't want page takeovers.
We don't want banners or towers.
We don't want scavenger hunts or anything remotely interactive.
We don't want that carousel crap on Instagram.

We want big splashy campaigns that are entertaining, persuasive and watercooler worthy.
We want catchphrases that are as funny the hundredth time they are repeated as they were the first.
We want outdoor boards that stop us in our tracks and tickle the brain.
We want to watch spots or films or videos, of any length, that merit sharing.
We want advertising that is not driven by data but driven by humans and the human need to be excited, to be amused, and to be moved.

We want home runs.


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