Thursday, July 12, 2018

The Genius from Montana

This is Senator Steve Daines.

He's from Montana. You probably don't know him but the FSB agents in Russia know all about this cheese monkey. He's one of their new Useful Idiots.

Read more about Steve in Thursday Thrashing letter #21.



Senator Daines
1 Russell Senate Courtyard, 
WashingtonDC 20510

Dear Senator Daines,

Or shall I address you as Senator Schrodinger? 

As you seem to have mastered the time/space continuum and now have the ability to be in two places at the exact same time.

Last week, you pulled off a miracle of science, perhaps the biggest breakthrough in physics since the splitting of the atom.

There are pictures of you and your wife at 4th of July fireworks celebration in Washington DC. There are also published pictures of you, alongside 7 other Republicans (The Prostrate Eight) at a conference table with your new Russian overlords in Moscow.

How can this be? Particularly since a cursory check of the airline schedule shows it be to be physically and logistically impossible.

This can mean only one of two things, Senator:

Either you're a boldfaced liar, like the other 20 Republican Senators who I have already corresponded with in my yearlong campaign of letter writing. 

Or, through the dint of hard work and good old fashioned American ingenuity, you and your lovely wife have broken through into the fifth dimension and now have the capacity to effortlessly defy the laws of nature that govern the rest of us mere mortals.

I have trouble believing the first choice, particularly in light of what we now know of the high character and integrity of Montana people. Watching your brethren at Precedent Shitgibbon's rally last week was simply inspiring.  

To see those hundreds of Montanans walk out of that arena when our Commander in Chief berated a national war hero like John McCain and then denigrate the charitable efforts of former President Bush, well, that just choked me up. It was so inspiring. You must be so proud of those good folks from Bozeman, Billings and Butte. 

That was American exceptionalism at its exceptional best. 

And so, there can only be conclusion, Senator Schrodinger. You have transcended time, eluded space and accomplished what Einstein, Newton and Neils Bohr could only have dreamed of.

Even more impressive is that -- and yes I've taken the trouble of reading your online bio -- your formal schooling never went beyond a bachelor's degree at the highly prestigious Montana State University.

Color me impressed.

If I didn't have to wait for the electrician to show up to replace a blown fuse, I come all the way up to Montana just to tip my hat to your achievement. Of course, with your new powers you could pop in to Culver City any time you'd like. 

Please do Steve, I'd love to shake your hand.


Rich Siegel
Culver City, CA 90232

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