Wednesday, August 2, 2017

For God's Sake

I could solve the country's economic woes in a heartbeat.

With one stroke of the pen, I could fill the government coffers up to the brim with new revenue. There'd be so much money coming in, they'd have to outsource the job and get cheap Chinese laborers to build new coffers.

Americans wouldn't need those coffer-building jobs because we'd be busy re-doing our infrastructure, bridges, highways, overpasses.

Hell, we'd have so much money, we could even start construction on new solar farms, windmills, and cold fusion plants.

Even that wouldn't put a dent in the new windfall. For Christ's sake we could provide each and every American proper comprehensive healthcare (you know like they have in every capitalist, first world country on the planet.)

And lest we still fear takeover from those Commie bastards, we could double the size of our already bloated military. Every one of our nuclear warheads could have its own mininuclear warhead.


"Jesus, Rich, what is this new disruptive idea? For the love of God, tell us."

Two words: Tax Religion.

According to the Hartford Institute, there are roughly 350,000 churches in America. That number includes all the denominations of Christianity (which reads like a Denny's Menu), all the mosques, synagogues and temples, Satanic, Wiccan or otherwise.

And those congregations take in billions and billions and billions of dollars. In real estate deals, in donations, in tithings and in sales of allegedly holy trinkets.

Take Joel Osteen.

He's a special kind of minister -- A Prosperity Minister. He tells his followers that Jesus wants them to be wealthy. That Jesus commands them to affluence. And, that for a yearly membership fee and some generous contributions, he can lead them down the path to prosperity. Proof that it works? Take a look at one of Osteen's homes.

That may look like an Olympic sized swimming pool in the lower left left hand corner to you and me.  But to the IRS it's a "baptismal submission center" where the faithful are submerged in the solar-heated purification waters of repentance.

This tax-free blasphemy is just a drop in the bucket. Osteen reportedly has 5 other "prayer centers" scattered throughout the country. Which he and his wife visit regularly using his fleet of private jets.

Did I say private jets? I meant "God's Wings of Redemption."

With Tax Reform coming up next on Precedent Shitgibbon's Agenda of Non-Accomplishment, I humbly suggest the governing party take a good long look at religion and start taxing the near half million houses of worship.

It's time those of you who believe in God start paying your fair share.
You know, like those of us who don't.

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