Wednesday, August 24, 2016

He, whose name I shall not speak

Winston Churchill once said, "You have enemies? Good that means you stood up for something."

Well, in the course of the past 6 months I've made an enemy. Who are we kidding? I've probably made more than one. But this one enemy in particular has now taken to publicly besmirching my good name on the Interwebs.

In accordance with a longstanding rule here at RoundSeventeen, I'm not going to give out his name. This ancient Hebraic tradition dates back to the time of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and all the goats they begat. As it is written in the Talmud, Rabbi Ezekiel once said,

"Thouest who is besmirched shall not partake in any further besmirching. Or the eating of any Lobster Newburgh."

And though I am prohibited from speaking his name, there is nothing that says I cannot lay out some clues for those who might be curious. As the picture above indicates (not his picture btw), he is a white male. He is given to wearing hoodies or the fashion of the minute. And he sports dreadlocks.

If I know my readers, and I believe I do, that has already caused half of you to whisper, "douchebag" silently in your head.

Let me get the other half on board the bus.

Hipster Bob Marley is also...wait for it...a Planner.

I've taken plenty of shots at Planning on this blog. Perhaps even too many. I've also had a career's worth of good work killed by the scholars in the Planning Department. Had that work left the agency and been approved by the client, I might be writing this piece from my oceanfront home in Malibu as opposed to my dump in Culver City.

So, in my feeble mind, it's somewhat justified.

What I have never done however is aim The Big Pointy Stick of Disdain at any one particular Planner.


Rasta Man thinks differently and recently tweeted that I had "a history of bullying planners, young female planners in particular."  

I don't take kindly to professional slander and asked him, point blank, to site the blog piece that backed up his spurious claim. That request went unanswered. A simple cut and paste on his part would have put me in my place.

But De Bredda couldn't post any evidence because there is no evidence.

Recently DanceHall Harry's name popped up in a contentious Facebook thread regarding the topic of creative plagiarism. I'm thoroughly against it. Dutty Money is for it. In a magazine interview he did years ago he was quoted as saying, in his annoying obtuse manner:

"Stealing in our schema of language is not dishonest. It exposes its debt. It uses the reference. It says, 'this is the reference. I'm using it. I'm putting it in here."


I've seen some semantic gymnastics, but this guy is a multi-gold medal winner.

Unlike many colleagues, I don't have a ton of achievements in my advertising career. But getting to the very top of this rastafarian gasbag's shitlist counts as one of my proudest.


Salty said...

Vacuous assertions backed up by zero facts?

At least his job title is correct. He's 100% a planner in the modern vein. Would that there were more who followed Martin Weigel than graduated from the jargon-tactic school of douchebaggery.

Théo said...

Let's hope his next client is a no-nonsense Jamaican lady.

Faris Hater said...

Faris is a right cunt. And a charlatan. But mainly a cunt.
Im assuming thats who you're referring to No one else . In his defence, he's not really white. But those dreads of his are still rank.

Anonymous said...

I was working at Chiat Day in the Biltmore Hotel, downtown.

Jay Chiat introduced me to a new staff member, an English gentleman who was referred to as a planner. First one of his breed, as I recall.

By way of introduction, Jay said, "This guy is called a planner. Tell him what you want to sell and he'll form some kind of justifiable argument that will help sell your work to the the client. Don't underestimate the power of an English accent amongst members of the grand proletariat."

And so it began.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous Jay Chiat person. I had the EXACT same situation with Hal Riney.

HAL: (To me) Come up with the idea. (To planner) He'll write the brief for it.

PLANNER: But Hal. I typically brief the team first, to inform their thinking.

HAL: (To him) That's not how I do it. (To me) Don't fuck this up.

Long story short - Planner hated idea. The idea sold. Planner quit after 2 months. Spot won awards.

Rich, I do not have a palace in Malibu to show for it.