Monday, October 5, 2015

Badvertising Week

Don't know if you were aware of this, but last week in NYC was Advertising Week.

I bring this to your attention because last week was noticeably devoid of any Facebook links or Tweets or Retweets from this mammoth extravaganza on behalf of the advertising industry.

Odd I thought.

Particularly in light of so many fascinating panels and forums about where and how our business is going. Take an almost verbatim (from the program) look at what you missed:

Demystifying B-To-B Buying 2015 and Beyond
-- a scintillating look at linear and sequential purchasing decision making processes and the provocative implications these have on the disintermediation of digital buying behaviors.

Holy shit, I bet they had a hard time finding enough folding chairs for the audience.

Direct to Consumer: OTT and the Future of Video Entertainment
--2015 has been a year of of expansion and experimentation. Amidst the frenzy of activity, participants in the value chain-- pure-play OTT players, broadcasters, telcos, content companies and advertisers-- are facing more questions than answers.

I hope they had enough popcorn for everybody.

What Marketers Who Know Mobile Marketing Don't Want You to Know
-- Experts reveal the findings from a $2 million research project that was two years in the making. Comprehensive. Exhaustive. Enough Big Data for two panels.

Gonna need some beefy bouncers and some red velvet rope to control the crowds itching to get in this one.

Those were real panels by the way. And that was just the first day. I couldn't stomach my way through the remainder but I'm pretty sure they never discussed the issues or had anything meaningful to say about the day-to-day stuff that touches all our lives.

If I were in charge of Advertising Week, these are some of the panels I'd set up:

Re-Planning the Planning
-- How is that it takes 9 weeks to prepare a one page Planning Brief leaving only three days to conceive, photoshop, powerpoint and assemble a 359 page deck of creative? Panelists will conduct a lively discussion on the vague definitions of "off brand", "off strategy" and "I don't know why but it's just not working for me."

Clients Who Demand Actors With More Energy
-- Not every bite deserves a smile. Educating clients who insist they know more about dramatic performance than the performers or the people they pay millions of dollars to deliver that performance. Yes, the line could be delivered with more energy, but that would be stupid.

Anthropology, Architecture and the 2016 Creative Department
-- Cutting edge architects will discuss maximizing agency revenue while minimizing expensive employee footprint. Jay Chiat's Virtual Office reshaped the 1990's. But the new SuperCage™ will redefine the way creatives go about their business in the late two thousand teens. Attendees will be given a sneak preview of the exciting new design, still in beta.

1 comment:

Salty said...

That we work in a business that believes such drivel is attractive – or makes any fucking sense whatsoever – is entirely depressing. Another attempt to mystify and astound with the perception of intelligence and self-importance, only to prove once again that this business is neither intelligent nor (in its current state) important.