Tuesday, April 1, 2014

This is the end


That's it, folks.

The well is dry.
The batteries in the keyboard are dead.
And my doctor will not renew my prescription for Vicoden.

So, we're closing up shop, throwing the deadbolt and calling it a wrap.

For some of you this could be the best news of the day.

"Thank the Lord. Now I don't have to put up with his insufferable stories, his shameless self-promotion and his unearned, bloated sense of righteous indignation. He's like a little school girl with an instagram account, a non-stop parade of desperate selfies that just cry out for attention." 

For others it will be like.

"Eh, who cares, now I'll have more time to read Kathy Hepinstall's blog. She's not as prodigious, but she's a real writer. And she's actually funny."

And for 5 people, this news may be crushing.

"You can't stop writing Round Seventeen. It's the first thing I read every morning. It puts a smile on my face. And makes life bearable."

Ok, maybe not 5 people, maybe two people, including my wife.

You might think that after five years and more than 1000 entries into this blog that my epitaph would be a long rambling tome, chock full of anecdotes and wisdom.

Or that it would be a heartfelt piece, with layers of snark and cynicism carefully peeled back to reveal a soft core of raw emotion and unabashed sentimentality.

But you'd be wrong.

You might also be wondering why am I pulling the plug today?

Yesterday was March 31st and web traffic for the month was 8500 page views, the highest monthly total ever. Taking the advice of one Jerry Seinfeld, "it's always good to leave on a high note."

Thank you.

It was fun.

9 comments:

Bob said...

Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, shame on me again. Fool me again last year, shame on me. But fool me a fourth consecutive time? No f-ing way.


Anyway, wish you wouldn't end the blog. Believe it or not, some of us actually enjoy it. And I think I learned something once, in June of 2011. Re-consider?

Rob Hatfield said...

April Fools!

Anonymous said...

You will be missed. All the best. Thanks for all the good stuff over the years.

Tux - Calgary, AB canada

@rebrivved said...

Not buying it.

jill savage said...

rich, I'm not even working with you & you're giving me a pain in my ass.

Unknown said...

NO! Please don't desert us. I know there are more than 5 readers, honestly. This is very sad.

laura sweet said...

I am hoping this is an April Fool's joke, but if not, let it be known that along with your wife, I am one of those who looks forward to reading this every morning.


Tony Mariani said...

Newman!

err

Siegel!

Anonymous said...

thank you cuz