Wednesday, April 23, 2014
God is dead
God and I haven't been speaking lately.
And by lately, I mean for the past thirty some odd years.
Ever since I learned that he willfully ignored the pleas of 6 million of my people who were being tortured, raped, brutalized and gassed to death in camps throughout Eastern Europe, but saw fit to help Alabama crush Auburn in a very important football game. And to clear the path for some pious beauty queen in search of a crown at some meaningless pageant.
So we're not talking.
And it would take more than a winning Powerball ticket to mend that relationship.
My secularism is growing more militant by the minute. Today my beef is with people who love and worship this God with the obviously misplaced priorities.
You know, a friend of my enemy is not my friend.
Or some variation of the transitive law.
I would have no quarrel with these folks if they went about their God business and left others alone. But that's not how it works, is it?
Those who fear God and love God and have a personal relationship with God are so eager to trot out their tired tropes they have all but invited some push back.
The Supreme Court is currently hearing a case brought by Hobby Lobby and their proprietors, the Green family. It's all about God and who God thinks should be eligible for health insurance.
The Greens are very religious people and don't want to be forced to pay for "objectionable" healthcare for their employees.
I'm sure the Greens also have a host of problems with homosexuals, Christ-deniers (Jews and Muslims) and people who watch Neil Degrasse Tyson's Cosmos. Fortunately none of those disinclinations have reached litigation.
In addition to their lawsuit in the highest court of the land, the Greens are seeking to introduce a forced bible study program into the public school system.
Like I said, religious people aren't happy until they impose their beliefs on everybody else. Even us Darwinists.
But I wonder if with all this proselytizing, the Greens could use a little biblical refresher course.
For one thing, Hobby Lobby is open on Saturday.
Saturday, in case David Green forgot, is the Sabbath.
It's the one my tribe observes.
And the one Jesus observed.
You know, until we killed him.
As we can see in this picture, David Green is wearing a cotton shirt and a wool blazer. I hate to point what could be viewed as a bit of hypocrisy but that's a no-no and a clear violation of Leviticus 19:19: neither shall there come upon thee a garment of linen mixed with wool.
I find it just a little disturbing that the Lord would be more concerned with our wardrobe choices and less concerned about people killing each other in Syria, Sudan, Iraq, etc.
But maybe that's just me.
Finally, are we to believe that the Greens, who are self-admitted strict adherents of both the Old Testament and the New Testament, have lived by the dietary laws set forth in Leviticus?
And never eaten a cheeseburger? Or an Easter Ham? Or enjoyed the fleshy, buttery, crustacean goodness only available at America's premier casual dining restaurant?
Sorry Mr. Green, if I may paraphrase the Red Lobster tagline...
We see God differently.