Tuesday, July 30, 2013

In search of swag

Michael Bolton?

What in the world could I possibly have to say about The Least Interesting Man In The World?

Well years ago, upon the advice of friends, my wife and I celebrated our first wedding anniversary with an incredibly indulgent (expensive) trip to the isle of Anguilla. There, we stayed at one of the finest hotels on God's Green Earth, Cap Jaluca. In fact, this resort is consistently listed among the Top 10 resorts in the world.

Deservedly so.
We thought.

And apparently so did Michael Bolton, who was shacking up with his girlfriend at the time, another C-lister Nicollette Sheridan, a platinum blonde who was fond of white string bikinis. In the 8 days we were there, I counted 5.

Our oceanfront hut, appointed in dark mahogany wood and featuring a stone grotto outdoor shower, was between the hotel lobby and Michael Bolton's 5 star thatched unit towards the outskirts of the property. And so he and Nic, would walk by us on many occasion.

There were days when the only people on the 1/4 mile long crescent beach of powdery golden sand and bath-water warm turquoise waters, were myself, my wife, Nicollette Sheridan and the mulletted one.

On those days I'm sure he thought, "I'm a big time star in the music industry why do I have to share this bit-o-paradise with a couple of civilians from Culver City?"

For those of you not in the know, the term civilians is how people in the entertainment industry refer to people who are not. As if you needed another reason to hate Hollywood people.

Oddly enough, I have become a member of the Michael Bolton Fan Club, the other Micheal Bolton. 

You might remember him singing in the cult classic Office Space:

No real point in all this. But here's a dirty little secret in the blogging world. Sometimes I'll mention a brand or a product and some industrious PR person, whose duty it is to scan the Internet for mentions, will reach out to me and offer to barter.

For more press, good or bad, though they prefer good, they will hold out some incentives. Blog about dry cleaning and get a year's worth of light starch. Want some free Diet Pepsi, start clacking away on that keyboard.

I'm not looking for a boxed set of Michael Bolton CD's.
But if the folks at Cap Jaluca are listening I'm ready to take the call.

1 comment:

Jeff said...

Cap Jaluca. Roxy '97.