Thursday, May 31, 2012

Avert your eyes


Something tells me I will live to regret this.

That is a picture of me in a Speedo. And I am printing this at great risk. Particularly considering how many people I have pranked over the years.

Once a colleague told us he had fallen for a crazy stalker girl in Germany. He naively gave us her name. Within weeks, and because we had connections in the Fatherland, he started receiving disturbing postcards that we had handwritten and forwarded across the pond so it would bare a European postmark.

He'd even read the postcards aloud to us at the office. You can imagine how difficult it was to stifle the laughter.

Another time, a friend told me he was working out of a hotel in NY but couldn't receive emails because the hotel was having computer issues. I quickly scribbled out a script and had another friend of mine call his room posing as the hotel manager. She explained that because of the computer problems he needed to come down to the front desk and confirm his excessive viewing of porn on the hotel's pay-per-view system.

Because it had the air of legitimacy about it, he fell hook, line and sinker and approached the front desk to tell the Assistant Manager Susan that he had not ordered Brazilian Babes in Bondage or Forrest Hump.

Again, there was great laughter.

So why am I taking this huge gamble?

As many of you know today I am beginning my symbolic swim across the English Channel to raise money for the Wounded Warriors. My hope is that you'll sign up and donate a buck a mile or even two bucks a mile.

These brave soldiers have sacrificed so much, sacrificing my time and now, my dignity, seems so little to give in return.

By the way, in case you hadn't guessed this picture was taken a while ago.
I look a little different now.

My racing number 65 is no longer inked across my arms and thigh.