But I did catch the highlights of President Obama throwing out the first pitch at a game several weeks ago. And like many sports fans, have sat nervously through the embarrassing ceremonial first pitches lobbed by many a celebrity. Pitches that didn't cross the plate. Or ended up in the hands of the third base coach.
What the hell is going on with this country?
What kind of mambi-pambis have we become? Are we descendants of the same brave men and women who kicked Nazi ass from Northern Africa to the forests of Finland? Did we not put a man on the moon? Wasn't it crafty, strong Americans who developed the technology and the tools to unleash the oil trapped beneath the ocean floor? OK, maybe that wasn't a good example.
My point stands.
It's 60 feet 6 inches from the pitcher's mound to home plate.
Can't anyone bring the heat without looking like a one-legged ostrich with Tourettes?